New year, new you, new me, new ways to stop thinking about how to lose the 20 pounds I’ve accumulated over the past 3 years. Here’s a new approach to the coming year for me, someone who was always raised to be critical of my weight, body, and physical appearance, because somehow my own beauty or lack thereof was a reflection of my family, self-worth, and self-respect. I say, as respectfully as I can:
Fuck That.
Bodies are great and I am thankful for my physically able body that has a few more pounds, a new shape, and the ability to do hot yoga. But my body is probably the least interesting thing about me. So here are my as yet unnumbered 2020 goals that have nothing to do with losing weight that I will discuss today. They will change. Some will be accomplished. Some will be forgotten. Others will be laughed at in December as I wonder why I thought that was important. They’re all a reflection of who am I now and what I think is important.
Goal 1: Be Brave
Introduce yourself to that person you’ve been following on Twitter and reading for years when you meet them at conference. Submit that solo article despite your feelings of imposter syndrome because the worst thing that can happen is that someone will say no and that has already happened on multiple occasions and you’ve lived through it and you are ok. Ask that mom you met at the park for a mom-date coffee. Try riding a damn bike.
Goal 2: Speak Spanish More Often
Yes, you sound like a second grader with a poor command of the language but how are you supposed to get better if you don’t practice? Slang is ok. Spanglish is how you were raised. Don’t be embarrassed that the Spanish you learned growing up might be construed by others as low class. It’s a part of the Tejana you are and always will be. See also, Goal 1.
Goal 3: Be Proud of Yourself
Stop undermining yourself and downplaying your accomplishments. Take time to celebrate and reflect on the work you’ve done.
Goal 4: Be Kind to Yourself
Sometimes things don’t get done, and that’s ok. There’s a lot to deal with in life and it isn’t easy. Don’t berate yourself or beat yourself up. Think about how you support a friend in your situation and support yourself that way.
Goal 5: Leave Work at Work
Your family needs you and you need them. You need time to yourself. You need time to recharge. Save some of (perhaps the best of? most of?) yourself for yourself and your family.
Goal 6: Tuesdays are for Treats
Grab ice cream with your kiddo. Go for a walk. Purchase a delicious coffee drink. Buy a new lipgloss. Meditate for a few minutes. Do something nice.
Goal 7: No More One-Sided Friendships
No one needs them. They are exhausting.
Goal 8: Show More Gratitude and Love
Tell the people you love that you love them. Give thanks. Small compliments and kind words go a long way. Don’t be stingy with them. Be generous and genuine with your praise.
That’s it! That’s the list! What are your goals for 2020?
